HEY YOU! check out my fancy nuts.
Friday, January 6, 2012 at 7:00AM
parowpyro in mascots, nuts, random ramblings

if you're a food or drink company who wants to be taken seriously these days, there's no better way than to give your brand an EXTREME mascot. from john jameson to dig 'em to that dos equis prick to the king from the burger king ads (RIP), with an EXTREME mascot you can easily let consumers know that you've got attitude. you can scream at them, "HEY YOU! THIS BRAND IS F'N CAH-RAYZEE (buy it & eat it)." on that note, let me introduce you to the one & only lord nut levington & his fancy lord nut levington thai dyed peanuts.

"he is...the gastronomical activist, leader of the taste resistance, bringer of true flavor to the masses. he is lord nut levington!"...or at least the side of the container tells me so. he also, as you can see, would appreciate it if you pardoned his flavor. he's a mustachioed, adventurous, BJ novak-looking type who wears a suit of armor and carries a fork & spoon, dispensing flavored peanuts to desperate snackers.

we're talking five ridiculously-named types of gourmet peanuts--rebel mary (bloody mary flavored), el cheddarales, mamma mia (tomato, garlic, cheese), cinnapalooza & the aforementioned thai dyed. each flavor comes with a ridiculous backstory. case in point: rebel mary is lord nut levington's former lover, a woman who had to leave him so she could truly do her part to cure blandness throughout the world. 

as for the thai dyed ones, they're a flavor discovery that lord nut made when he was shipwrecked & ended up washing up on the shores of thailand. after many trials & tribulations on the island, the people provided him with a replacement boat filled with lemongrass curry, a boat that he used to sail back home. from there, he used the thai people's gift to create thai curry & and lemongrass flavored peanuts. OBVIOUSLY.

i'm not sure when that crazy thai adventure happened exactly but apparently the supply of lemongrass curry still hasn't run out, so lord nut continues to pump out the thai dyed peanuts, selling them for upwards of $4 a can here in NYC. i ended up eating around half of the can all at once, attempting to diagnose exactly what was going on with the flavor. it's definitely reminiscent of thai curry, with hints of sweetness & citrus and is really unlike anything i've tried on a peanut before. it's pretty crazy.

after half a can, i eventually discovered that the flavor wasn't as mind-blowing as i'd initially thought. i guess that's just the law of diminishing marginal utility or some shizz for ya. regardless, they're still quite tasty & i see a lot more of deez nuts in my future. hopefully i can locate those bloody mary flavored ones ASAP. if not, the thai dyed ones will do just fine.

Article originally appeared on meditation via snacking. (http://www.eatdrinksnack.com/).
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