the musical fruit: movement #11.

the musical fruit: movement #11.
song: "december 4th," danger mouse
fruit: pluot

it's mashup day on the musical fruit! to celebrate, today's song is "december 4th," which mashes up jay-z's "december 4th" with the beatles' "mother nature's son." it's off of danger mouse's the grey album, the 2004 recording that mixed jay-z's the black album with the beatles' the white album (which is totally remastered as of today! 09.09.09! it's like reverse satan day or something!). the jay-z stuff was released a capella for the purpose of mashups & whatnot, but the beatles stuff wasn't authorized, so both EMI (who owns the white album masters) & sony (who owns the beatles' compositions) were totally pissed. they both tried to stop illegal art (the label) from distributing it but eventually, they totally backed down.

...so "december 4th" is my favorite song on the album. it's largely for narcissistic reasons, but isn't that why i do pretty much everything? the song has jay-z's moms speaking over the top of it & she's all "sean this" & "sean that," so although it's spelled incorrectly, it makes me feel like i'm being talked about in a sweet mashup. well...i feel that way most of the time. she's all "sean was a very shy child growing up (so true). he was into sports (also true) & a funny story is at four, he taught himself how to ride a bike (so not true). isn't that special?" i can't ride a bike, ok gloria? why must you rub it in my face? yes! it is special! all tormenting aside, when it comes right down to it, i actually prefer the acousticy danger mouse background over the chi-lites jay-z background from the black album. mashup success!

let's get one thing clear right off the bat. that pluot is sort of shaped like a part of human anatomy. i'm not going to say which one, but that's what goes through my head when i look at that photo. it's a fruit that's a hybrid of a plum & an apricot, the brainchild of floyd zaiger, a biologist who's all famous & shizz worldwide for his work with fruits. on top of creating other hybrid fruits such as the peacotum (a nectarine crossed with a plum & an apricot) & the nectaplum (nectarine & plum), his genetics program has made a ton of tweaks to the fruits we eat. for his work, dude's been declared an "officier" in the "order du merite agricole," which is apparently a pretty important food-related french government honor...all because he loves fruits.

he did a good job with the pluot. it's got that plummy taste but it's not as tart & it has a consistency not unlike that of a peach. i guess that's the apricot part doing its thing. the eating with the skin on test (which will from this day forth be referred to as the "TEWTSOT")? the pluot passed. with a plum, the skin usually tries its best to snake its way between my teeth & hold on for dear life. not so with the pluot. i like that. thanks, pluot. i just like saying it. pluot. PLUOT TEWTSOT! thanks, to you as well, mr zaiger.

...& i'd like to close with a joke:

Q: what do you get when you cross a biologist with an accountant?
A: a zaiger counter